Only one guide (one specific person in all of creation) can gain your party entry into the forbidden city. If you can find him, he must be able to perform the sacred and mandatory 'dance' upon reaching the innards of the first Pearly Gate of the Inisfreean Perimeter Wall. The passage through all successive Pearly Gates may only be granted if this dance is executed flawlessly.
First, the guide will make the rapid "tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick" noise with his tongue tap-flicking the roof of his mouth. If performed correctly, an answer will come a few seconds later; quiet growling like the Predators of the sci-fi movie from Earth-That-Was.
A shadowy figure will slowly fade into view as if out of the thin air in your dark ante-chamber, the First Gate's first room just inside the outermost facet of the Perimeter Wall. Standing almost as tall as your guide, and adorned in full-bodied armor almost like a second skin, this being will initially appear to be a Shadow Elemental, and it will speak as if it has three voices sounding all at once; one hissing, one growling, and one synthesized, sounding truly alien and demonic.
It and your guide will speak words that seem random, and are; only saying them not because they are their code, but to hear each other's voices, and confirm they are the correct vocal signatures. For example, you may here the challenges and passes (utterances and replies) of: "Hitler", "red", "sky", "co-sign", "radially", "Do not move.", "I shall kill you now.", "And I, you."; the latter of which being tests for each other, as well as for their accompanying parties, ensuring that none of their members are fearful or assumptive fools.
The guide will then growl, contort his face like a vampire hissing, and leap forward into what appears to be mortal battle with the other; the apparent Shadow Elemental being. The armor-suited warrior will fight him viciously, killing anyone who intervenes by unseen magics. This sentry being and the guide will hit, kick, head-butt, and throw each other. Then its lion-head helmet will flow like water back up and away from its face from all sides.
A woman beautiful like no one could ever imagine will at that point be revealed to have been the pilot within the suit, and your guide and she will touch each other's crotches with the same hands (not a mirrored gesture). As they each take the other's free hand (again, not a mirrored gesture) to form the heart shape with those digits (each one's free hand forming half of the classical heart shape outline), and as they each trace their own tongue around the other's lips before spelling FOBian language symbols on the other's tongue with their own tongue, this will then lead them into doing the Shared Breath technique back and forth as Morse code.
They will then hum an ancient tune, each of them humming every other note, so the two of them overlap their notes sequence; the same concept as 'talking guns'. The whole time, staring deeply into each other's eyes, both will watch how the other's eyes flex; the guide watching how the girl-gatekeeper's irises very faintly let all the colors of the rainbow flow and radiate through them, like an aurora of the irises. When she is aroused and satisfied from all of this thus far, certain color groups and brightnesses will fluctuate, then fade; the 'Kesha flash' as was animated in one of that artist’s videos.
The guide at this point will then slap her hard across her face, making her whole upper body rotate away and then back to face him. She will then do the same to him, and he will make no effort to block it -just as she made no effort to block his strike. Then they will caress each other's cheeks, clasp their hands together, and lick the other's palms and between their fingers firmly.
Stepping forward, the two will then grab each other's throats, take hold of their arms, and lean back into partners-yoga balancing positions. (It may seem that they are becoming one mind and one body due to the sheer gracefulness and synchronicity at this point in the identification and authorization process.) Next, they will ease out of their final joined position, standing again, and step back, then rush back together, swinging their forearms and shins rapidly, intercepting one another's as if they were their swords clanging and sparking, bouncing and sliding off one another's. This leads into them going through the various Sayoc Kali templates, as well as some moves from Krav Maga, Ninjutsu, and Jeet Kune Do. After that, they will move such that each will be mirroring the Gun Katas of the other (still facing one another), with the guide leading and the girl-gatekeeper making sure his lead is correct.
Next, they will both pause and stare at each other, listening and feeling the other's vibrations across the gap between them. Then they will step in and bite each other's necks at the same time on the carotid side, but only enough to draw a few drops of blood from the epidermis, which they lick back up, resting warm hands on the saliva-moistened nip nicks.
The girl-gatekeeper will open her groin-guard and take the guide's hand, placing its digits inside her pussy. He will push his fingers all the way into her, then retrieve, smell, and taste them. Satisfied with her, he will open his fly and takes her hand, placing it on his cock and balls. She will gently cup and caress them, then rub the tip of his dick for a bead of its moisture, and retrieve her hand to smell and taste it, too.
Both will lie down, still in their complex challenge-and-pass, roll to opposing sides such that their heads are inverted, mouths wide and fully open, and slide their tongues out to touch tips as far in as possible; again, simultaneously.
When they each roll back onto all fours, peacocking before one another, the guide will roar deafeningly at her until it echoes off all of the dark antechamber's walls. She will hiss like a vampire, wild-eyed looking into his mouth and then his eyes again, curtsy, and snarl, quietly fading her snarl into a mewl. Then they will both rise, returning to their regal postures, bow, and stand tall again, Nazi-saluting each other (the salute is more akin to the Romans’ or any other empire’s gesture of proud loyalty).
Dozens of others in her same kind of suit will then appear from the shadows all around the guide's group of visitors, none baring shield, sword, or gun ( for all of those things are hidden inside their suits; built in). The guide will then beat his chest like a gorilla; the 'silver-back' dominance and stress-relieving gesture, signaling that he has dominated the challenge-and-pass, and that all in their antechamber are naturally very much relieved on many levels.
The door they all are standing before will remain shut, while everyone walks through the wall beside it; it is a selective quantum ‘smart’-filter. The guide will flick his head to the side briefly to indicate his guests follow him, and the lion-helmed FOBian warrioresses and he will smoothly descend to walk on our ‘all fours’.
Once inside this special filter, they will board his vehicle called the Irradiati, and drive through the 12 Gates, appearing as if no portals or turning are going on at all; the actions of the Gates being so smooth as to be imperceptible. Despite appearances, these titanic, armored chambers will be steadily rotating (while the group is driving within them from entry point to exit); to align with each successive change in the cavernous route within the mountain-range-sized Perimeter Wall. At the final point of each of these Pearly Gates (each ‘gate’ being an identical series of chambers and turns), they will pass through another ‘smart’-filter; a hidden membrane that teleports them into the start of the next Gate in the sequence of 12.
"We are beyond and above the angels and demons. They are like peasants to us. We love and honor them, but they cannot go here. No gods, goddesses, or anything above or below them, may or can come into this land." Such are the words of the guide, who now seems more of a reigning captain here, and down the opening, lowering, extending, stadium-sized ramp into the city's Welcoming Square their Irradiati vehicle will smoothly drive.
It is there they will be met by FOBians (also called Inisfreeans) who do the forearm-grabbing greeting with him (the local variation on the firm, smacking handshake), and they will say to guide turned city-wide captain: "There are no pacts between lions and men," to which he will jut his chin as he replies: "Verily," smiling devilishly with his once-again flashing pride. And all of them will say: "Amen-Ra,” the Inisfreean version of ‘amen’, (good) omen’, ‘Amun-Ra’ (the conscious Sun entity deified by the Outlanders), and ‘oorah’ (the defiant war-cry of the Marines sworn by oath and hymn to forever guard the streets of Heaven on Earth).